Sanjhee Gianchandani

Blue is the colour of love

When you saw me first I was dressed in blue 

A dress gifted by my deceased mother

Whose choice was dismissed by you 

I mustn’t have seen it then

We met at the poolside cafe later 

You ordered a fancy crème brûlée

And mocked me for my mispronunciation 

I ate my blueberry cheesecake in silence

I couldn’t see it then 

Mistook your egoistic remarks for ‘advice’ 

The oceanic depths of your bitter heart 

I waded through, but couldn’t survive

You gave me more blues than blushes

But I didn’t see it then

Then out of the blue one day 

you’d knock my door again with

a bouquet of periwinkles which

you liked and I would again resign

I wasn’t ready to see it then

You gaslighted me to insanity 

and burnt my selfhood away in the

blue flame of the manipulative candle

Apologies were in a blue moon 

I couldn’t see it then

I was fighting a battle with depression

which you obviously didn’t understand 

My therapist knew everything about you

But I didn’t heed to her and took the blues

I wasn’t able to see it then

We You decided to take the plunge 

A heavy sapphire sits on my finger

And every day against the skies 

when you force yourself, I drown 

I think I can see it now

And whenever I spoke my mind 

you’d raise your hand one me

beat me till I was black and blue 

Finally, with my contused eyes I saw

that the colour of your love is blue

Sanjhee Gianchandani holds a Masters’ degree in English from Lady Shri Ram College for Women and a CELTA from the University of Cambridge. She worked as an English language assessment specialist. Her love for publishing brought her to her current job as an ELT editor in the K-8 space. She compulsively writes poetry to fill in the interstices in her day and to streamline the chaos in her head. Her poems have been published at several places including Madras Courier, eFiction India, LiveWire, Setu, Indian Ruminations, Otherwise Engaged Journal and Poetry Northern Ireland.